Don’t Let Their Troubles Trouble You

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My Dear Younger Self:

I must admit, I have a very difficult time remembering you. Logic tells me I was young once and that I knew you, but the difficulties of the adult world seem to have brutally cut me off from you. Nonetheless, when I do take the time to stop and think of you, I cannot help but smile. It isn’t a broad toothy grin like the beauty pageant contestants do, you know how I was never skilled in those awful things, but a soft sweet smile filled with fondness.

For while drawing up your image from the deep recesses of my memory, I recall how worried you were about trying to be thin. Which seems so curious to me now, as when I see you in both pictures and in my mind’s eye, the thing that strikes me the most is just how thin you actually are. Only I know how very hard it was for you to achieve that thinness. For once adolescence hit, your weight soared up to 184 pounds. But as undaunted as you are, you became a vegetarian who ate only fat-free foods to lose over fifty pounds. It was quite a feat on your part. And you’d probably be shocked to know that after all that effort, it only lasted for a very brief amount of time. For every morning when I get on the scale, it hovers ever more closely to 240 pounds. Yet, when all is said and done, it is far from the end of the world. While not exactly ideal for dancing ballet, it doesn’t prohibit it, and I still do my pliés at home in order to maintain my flexibility and connect with my love of the art form.

Speaking of ballet, I know the adult world isn’t far from off point when they say you can’t make a living through piano, voice, and ballet. However, what they don’t know and neglect to tell you is that the unpredictability of the economy through recessions and economic downturns, render the concept of making a living unfathomably challenging in any field. So don’t fret about whether or not to study law, medicine, or engineering. Stay true to yourself and enjoy your love of piano, singing opera, and dancing classical ballet. Go ahead and major in them in college, you will be more content knowing that you’ve been true to your love of art rather than struggling to make it in the non-artistic professional world. A world that, truthfully, could benefit from having more art in it.

While Mommy always emphasizes family and being close to family which is a virtuous ideal, at the same time, do not let it hold you back in any way. You don’t know it yet, but there are some traumatic reasons for why your brother and others are such incredibly difficult people. In a few more years, they will move on without ever thinking twice about you. So don’t let their troubles trouble you. Most importantly, don’t let their haughty and disdainful perceptions of you cruelly invade your mind and become the perception you have of your own self. The people who knew you when you were little and the people who will meet you when you go to college think very highly of you to this day. They are the ones from whom you can accurately perceive your own self. A self who is genuine, beautiful, intelligent, without malice, true, talented, and lovely both inside and out. It may sound like a cliché, but the truth it contains is as enduring now as ever, for as Oscar Wilde puts it, “Be yourself; everyone else is already taken.”

In closing, I just want to let you know that I have really enjoyed contacting you. And I do so very much hope our paths will cross again someday. The more I reflect make upon our acquaintance, the more real you become to me. The clutter of the world slowly fades away when I think of you. And I do believe that you and I can actually have a very good time together.

‘Till we meet again,

Luisa Kay Reyes

Luisa Kay Reyes

Luisa Kay Reyes has had pieces featured in "The Raven Chronicles", "The Windmill", "The Foliate Oak", "The Eastern Iowa Review", and other literary magazines. Her essay, "Thank You", is the winner of the April 2017 memoir contest of "The Dead Mule School Of Southern Literature". And her Christmas poem was a first place winner in the 16th Annual Stark County District Library Poetry Contest. Additionally, her essay "My Border Crossing" received a Pushcart Prize nomination from the Port Yonder Press. And two of her essays have been nominated for the "Best of the Net" anthology. With one of her essays recently being featured on "The Dirty Spoon" radio hour.

https://www.facebook.com/LuisaKayReyesWriter/
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